come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
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