so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
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