I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
There was a lot of him and a little penis
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
