I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
ttyl tear gas
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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