I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
