I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Randomize
