I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
There r osticjed everywhere
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
