How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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