yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
