So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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