Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
