so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
