alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
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