Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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