Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
