i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
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