Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
