This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
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