you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
