porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
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