Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
Randomize
