i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Randomize
