tell your sister to shave her snatch
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize