Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
His nipple licking is glorious
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