sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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