I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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