best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
