id be glad to
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
