What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
