smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
Randomize
