you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
