sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
