i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Randomize
