when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
look no pants
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Randomize
