I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
I am midnight drunk by noon
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
