Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Randomize
