So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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