But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
