Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
