I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
there was a trapeze. enough said
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Boobs are out for the taking
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
