It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize