Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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