I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
