so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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