Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize