So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Randomize
