Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
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