I just saw a hot homeless man
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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