Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Randomize
