don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Life is so much better after having sex.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
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