it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
