I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize