You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
i used baking grease as lip gloss
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Randomize