a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
